Dear Temp Secretary,
Ok first thing - I like you. Until today, you were significantly less annoying than the secretary you replaced. But listen, you don’t even work here. And yes, it’s casual Friday, and a holiday, and we’re all feeling it. But that does NOT mean you should be singing Rhianna songs out loud at your desk for two hours. You are not Rhianna. If you were playing Rhianna songs, I’d be like “ok I don’t know why I have to listen to this for two hours but whatever.” But you’re not. You’re just singing. You’re not half bad, but that shit is distracting. Your cubicle is all of 5 feet from my office door. That means:
1) I can hear you like you’re sitting next to me.
2) I have to close my door but then people think I’m slacking off in here looking at porn or something instead of half-working and half-tumblring.
3) If I throw a law book, it will hurt you.
Sincerely yours,
Law Clerk Who Doesn’t Have the Authority or Heart to Tell You To Shut Up
Telling her to shut up would burn 12 calories.
Just saying.
